“I’m Good,” “What have you” and “or whatever”

Uh oh, there goes another one (well, this time more than one) and the Blogmaster is about to take off and run with them. Did you ever ask anyone how they were feeling only to get the response: “I’m good.” I didn’t ask how they taste, nor did I ask about their behavior. My inquiry had to do with how they were feeling. I guess the root of the problem stems from the fact that we have used the word good wrong for so long in describing how we feel. Has anyone out there —besides me—ever heard of the word WELL? It is a word. Honest! The online Mirriam Webster dictionary has 58 definition entries for the word well. The definitions that you get depend on whether you want to use the word as a nonun, verb, adverb, adjective, interjection, conjunction or preposition.

I’m not that old (well, my kids think I’m ancient) but I remember the days when the purpose of the dictionary was to define what words really mean. But not today, oh no! Today’s dictionary is a combination of what word really (or used to) mean as well as how society has decided to use certain words, whether its correct or not. Many words (because of the way they are used) have been totally re-defined. That’s wrong! Instead of re-defining the words people should be made to use them correctly. This all reminds me of schoolhouse rock that use to come on when I was younger. I used to think it was silly then but those little jingles have stuck with me all my life! I know the preamble to the constitution because it was presented in song (by the way don’t ask my wife to sing it for you–she has her own version), I know about bills and laws, and I know about parts of speech (Remember Conjunction Junction what’s your function?). So Well can be many different parts of speech and fit right in where you need it to. Similarly, I looked up good and found a whopping 33 entries depending on whether it is used as an adjective, noun or adverb. Not as versatile as the world well.

Years ago, before “I’m good” became a catch phrase, I used to know just one person who would say it. A young lady who used to go to my church. We would chat every now and then before she went away from College. When I asked her how she was doing, her response was always, “I’m good.” So I stared asking, when I saw her in the hallways, “are you good?” And her reply always came back, “I’m good.”

Well I could get stuck on I’m good all night, but I at least want to devote a paragraph to the lazy people in our society who, instead of saying what it is they are actually thinking….or in most cases actually having to think about what it is they need to say and then saying it, they come out with “or whatever” and/or “what have you.” It drives me absolutely bananas. SAY WHAT YOU REALLY MEAN! Do they even realize that when they come out with “or whatever” and “what have you” that they are making everyone else guess what it is they are going to/want to say. And there is a good chance that we will guess wrong!

Well, i’ve been chewing on this one for a couple of days now. it’s not going to get any better so I think I’ll just cut it loose before I start saying things I don’t want to say or whatever. Then people will get really confused or what have you and I will not have made my point. I better stop while I’m still good–or is that supposed to be “It’s all good?” Oh no! Another post! 😆

Tag! I’m it

Looks like I’ve been tagged by my friend, Ginger. I’d like to take this moment, before I go into my post, to thank her ever so much for tagging me and making me think of answers for these categories. Now my life is complete.

Four things I was doing ten years ago:

1. Well to begin with I was getting very frustrated because I had just changed had my job assignment changed while I was out on Parental Leave when we had our oldest girl, Grace. I found out that the job I now had never had enough time allocated to get it accomplished—Still doing it, still not enough time.
2. If I now me, I was probably wondering what I was going to be doing 10 years from now (then).
3. Not getting a whole lot of sleep. Grace was almost 3 months old and i had the night shift. Sleeping all the way through the night, apparently, was not an option. So, THIS is what it was going to be like to have a girl…OH JOY!
4. Wondering what we were going to do for a vehicle if we had any more children. With Grace (#5) we now completely filled our ’89 mini-van (now pushing 9 years old) and didn’t have any more room.

Four things I was doing five years ago:

1. Actively looking for another job. I liked my job, but not the guy who I was working for. it was not a good time.
2. I was planning a 20th wedding anniversary trip for my wife and I (who else?) to Colonial Williamsburg and had just about all of the information I needed to make reservations.
3. Which brings me to the next thing on my list…All of these plans were soon quashed when, with the impending delivery of our 7th child and some complications arising, my wife was put on bed rest.
4. Lastly I was planning one of the biggest life changing events that has ever occurred. We were getting #1 son ready to send off to college in the fall.

Four things I am doing this year:

1. Branching out with my blog
2. Trying to read a book a month
3. Reading through the Bible in a year, chronologically
4. Attempting to lose 28 pounds (get down to 175) and keep 20 of them off!

Four things I did yesterday:

1. Tried a tomato and basil ramen meal, since it was on sale. I was really glad I only bought one and that it was only .99 because I didn’t like it!
2. Went to church, of course. What else do you do on a Wednesday night if you’re able to go?
3. Bid on a new watch on e-bay when I found out that getting anew watch and getting a replacement watch band were only a few dollars differnce.
4. I was so tired I felll asleep at the comptuer and never got any work done.

Four Shows I like:

(This is a hard one, we don’t watch much TV anymore)

1. Star Trek, The Next Generation
2. Little House on the Prairie
3. McGuyver
4. Thunderbirds (anybody remember that one? The one with the manequins.)

Four biggest joys of the moment:

1. My Salvation
2. My Wife
3. My Children
4. Writing

Four People I’m tagging:

My Wife: Warren’s Wife
My Friend: Capital G. Geek
My Sister: Dadiva’s Street
My Competition Team Leader: Irish Mom

And now its YOUR turn to tag 4 other people, if you wish to continue to participate, but please don’t feel obligated.

Like

Like is another one of those words that I like have a problem with. I was like trying to like figure out the best way to like express my like thoughts about how the like younger like culture today just like abuses this word. I was like talking to one of the teens in my like church the other day and he like used the like word like like 5 time in one like paragraph.

I was like “Alex (Name changed to protect the like innocent) how can you like use like the word like so many times. Isn’t there like something wrong with that. And he was like, “No. I don’t like think that there is like anything like wrong with it.” So, I was like, OK, I must just be like too old to be able to like deal with it. I tried to explain that h wasn’t “like” when he talking but, rather, he says something. And the same for their person when you’re talking…they’re not like! They actually SAY something. Everything does not have a like (correct usage here by the way!) in fornt of it. Either it is or it isn’t.

And to add to the like problem. Someone like came up to him and like asked him like how he was doing. And Alex was like “I’m Good.” And THAT, ladies and gents, is the subject of my next post!

Older or Wiser or Neither?

Going grey is an inevitable part of getting older.

So…people say, “Gray happens!”
Yes it does, but why is it happening to me? 😆 I got on the elevator the other day and a colleague of mine, who I had not seen in quite some time said to me…”Your hair is getting gray! So, how are you doing?” Well, of course my only possible response at this point was , “Well I was doing great until I got on the elevator with YOU! (Now there’s a good Christian response! –NOT). It was kind of a shell shocker for me. People have always complimented me on how YOUNG I look. That in itself makes it that much harder to handle the fact that I might look old. The gray hair defiitely makes a difference. Check out this picuture on the right that I “borrowed” from, of all places the grecian forumula website (Sorry about the 1,2,3, but I think they’re touting their three step process). The one thing that stood out to me on their site is that it is no longer called grecian formula for MEN. Hmmmmm. The difference between the gray and the brown on this pic look dramatic to me. How would I look with a shocking gray head? Older? Wiser? I guess that would depend on who you ask. My fear is the more I look like an old man, the more I’ll feel like and old man. I sure do have enough old man aches and pains. And I don’t want my wife to wake up one morning and scream saying “who are you and what are you doing on my husband’s side of the bed?” OK, well that one probably won’t happen! I have had some ladies tell me that I would look rather distinguished with gray hair. None of them are very likely to read this blog, but just the same I should say, “Thank you very much!”

In my search for pictures of people with gray hair I found a picture where they morhped gray hair into our Secretary of State. The look makes a dramatic difference. I was inclined to look up the physical reason for hair turning grey. I was sure the normal colored hair didn’t just decide to go on strike one day. I found the answer here: Why does hair turn grey.

In an attempt to keep some humor about this, I found a few jokes that had to do with the subject. Well….I hope you think they’re humorous….

Customer: What do you have for grey hair?

Barber: The greatest respect sir!

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Customer: I’ve got lovely black hair running down my back!?

Barber: Pity its not on your head then!

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When an actress saw her first strands of gray hair she thought she’d dye.

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“I wonder if my husband will love me when my hair turns gray.”

“Why not?” retorted her close friend, “He’s already loved you through four other colors.”

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I think this one says it the best: It’s great to have a gray hair. Ask anyone who’s bald.

So….Older? Wiser? Neither? In all honesty, I just don’t know for sure about the other two, but with every passing second we can’t help but get older!

Divorce is not a verb

This is the first of my “is not a verb” posts. Perhaps its because I was an English major “back in the day” (as my kids would say) when I was in college. Maybe it is because I am a writer, maybe it is because for me it is just one of life’s little annoyances. Whatever the reason, I am have decided to embark on this journey, so just sit back, relax, (and where possible) enjoy yourself. Today’s topic is not only thought provoking but also one of those hard ones to deal with…. Here goes!

Divorce is NOT a verb! Do you know that there are a lot of people, including Merriam Webster who don’t realize that. I have a problem with the dictionary adopting the meaning of the day instead of putting down what a word actually means and how it is supposed to be used. Divorce is one of those words. This is a hard topic to deal with because divorces are obtained left and right in our day and age. The rate is alarming! The website divorcerate.org maintains that the divorce rate is not quite 50% as is usually reported–yet still pretty high– but even their stats confuse me. Why? Because they break up the divorce rate among men and women. Could somebody please tell me how that can be done. When one person obtains a divorce does it not effect both parties? And isn’t marriage the union between one man and one woman? That being the case shouldn’t the divorce rate between men and women be equal or is my math off! Must be that gnu math. I’m not sure who came up with that breakdown, but they need to rethink it. And we wonder why we have to redefine marriage.

What most people don’t want to realize is that the marriage vow is for better or for worse. The vow does not say to stay together when things are better and get out of dodge when things are worse. But that is what our world thinks is the case. A lot of people may not agree with this, but the vows are the way they are so that there is not any wiggle room and people actually HAVE to work things out. (Oh no! He didn’t say that did he?). But people don’t work things out any more…they go to court and obtain a divorce. God Condemns divorce in the book of Malachi!

God allowed for divorce through Mosaic law with the “bill of divorcement.” I think it is because he knew that we were not perfect and that as sinful beings divorce of some type (allowed or not) would happen. I think that is the only reason he allowed a provision for it. But it is CLEARLY not his preference.

Some folks will say that it is in the Bible so it must be OK with God. Sin is in the Bible! Is sin OK with God? NOOOOOOO! God also gave specific guidelines for divorce, which I believe were closely followed at one time, but not any longer.

Notice that in the biblical sense, divorce is not a verb! We don’t “get” diovrces and we don’t “get” divorced. But when they decided that it became a state of being they also tried to make it into an action word. And with the rate at which divorce occurs these days, it is hard to make the argument that I am making. Nonetheless, I’m making it! The word itself and the practice needs to be stricken from our language an lifestyles. Most people who go through the divorce process do so because they can’t change their spouses into what they want them to be. The BIBLE says we need to change ourselves and in doing so that will cause others to change. But then that means the onus is on us! (Just what God wants!!!) I guess we can’t have that. Besides, its so much easier, society has found, to displace the blame. Christians and non-Christians alike are just as guilty. For better or for worse means divorce is NOT an option. But I hear these days you can change your vows so that that phrase is not included. Why bother getting married? To me that is getting married and planning on going through a divorce at some point. Well I could ramble on for quite some time, but I’m sure you have other blog entries that you want to get to. So, now that I have made my point, I’ll end this one here and start work on the next “is not a verb” post. Many of you who know me can surely guess what’s coming next! 🙂

Mother’s Day

Well, here I am a whole week late with this post, but here it is! Better late than never, I suppose. 🙂

I was trying to make Mother’s day real special for my wife, as I try to every year, but when it comes on a Sunday and you’re involved in early morning church ministries, that kind of complicates things. I didn’t have the liberty of doing the breakfast in bed and other nice little things like that and, while my younger ones were willing, they just were not able. So….I had to do my best with what I could….

Well lets talk about the start of the day. All I wanted to do was get my wife’s card signed and then go upstairs and decorate the white board with a simple happy mother’s day message. Usually on Sunday’s I’m the only one who is around and about this early in the morning. But, oh no, not this Sunday. THIS Sunday my wife decided to get out of bed early! Now I had to act like I was doing something else and hide all traces of what I was actually doing. To top it all off, she was upstairs doing stuff too, so I couldn’t get the whiteboard decorated. Mind you, I’m on a limited time schedule here. 😆 Any other Sunday and she would have been sleeping like a baby. Well, at least I had the sense to have the kids do their cards and stuff the night before. They didn’t have to worry about this!

Well that was pretty much the morning. I wouldn’t see my wife again until the afternoon! There was a special activity at church but I was able to get back in time to be able to grill the hamburgers that my wife wanted for lunch/dinner. You guys out there, If you have a wife like mine, you know how hard it is to keep her out of the kitchen and keep her from cleaning. My wife certainly made it a challenge. She cleans without even thinking about it. Unbelievable! I had to actually kick her out of the kitchen so that I could clean it! i tried to take care of the kids and keep them out of her hair, but, honestly, I’m not sure how good of a job I did. Then it was fast food for the evening meal (so I didn’t have to cook and she didn’t have to think about cleaning) to round off the day. I got the little ones in bed and proceeded to beat my wife at backgammon and Acey-Deucy (not intentionally, but what can I do about the dice? I have to take whatever comes up right? No matter, she’ll get me back!

My wife wants her carpets cleaned and professional family photos taken. Neither of which has been done yet, but I’ll make sure that it gets done. I tried to get my son (who works for Stanley Steamer cleaning carpets) come up and do the carpets, the visit would have been worth the price, but he couldn’t make it. All-in-all, I think it was a good day. But I also think I that it could have been better. 🙂 I am glad that the Lord gave my wife to me and that she is the mom of my 7 (yes seven) children. I pray that the Lord gives us many more Mother’s days together.   I’ll get that many more chances to make them special!

Economic Stimulus Checks

Some people are being stimulated the wrong way by this whole economic stimulus thing. 15,000 people did not get their check because a computer glitch put fifteen thousand checks into the the wrong bank accounts! We got ours OK, and they say that the majority of people who have been issued them have received them OK, but there are those 15,000 who, hopefully, have not already spent the money, because their checks went to the wrong way.

I couldn’t believe it when I read the story this morning, well I guess I could. 🙂 What I thought was exceptional–and definitely unexpected–was that the IRS was notified by someone who got an unexpected $1,800 deposit in his bank account. the bank was able to track it down to a deposit from the IRS and the man called right away. Most people these days, unfortunately, would have just taken the windfall and been spending their little hearts out. Not a smart move. When the IRS tracks them all down, the WILL get their money back, even if they have to take it before you receive your paycheck! And, even though it was THEIR mistake….they will take their money back with interest! I just hope they don’t have another glitch and decide that checks that were deposited legitimately need to be taken back! After seeing their first mistake, it could happen!

So……where is YOUR economic stimulus check? The IRS actually has a form setup on their website that you can check to see the status of your economic stimulus payment. The information is not available until a week before your payment will be sent. If you’re interested you can click on this link to check your Stimulus Payment Status.

The question has been asked as to whether the economic stimulus payment is taxable. Well, the wishy-washy answer from the IRS is: The economic stimulus payment is not taxable and will not increase your taxable income any, but you should keep your documentation and records regarding it just in case. Will someone please define “just in case”!!!!!! The way I read that is, its not taxable now, but when the tax laws are passed for next year (and just why do they change them every year?) I expect that all or at least part of the payment will be taxable. Otherwise the answer would have just been: NO! Not taxable.

The payment was probably a good idea to infuse the economy with cash and get some things under control, lets just hope that it doesn’t turn into a nightmare because of this.

Cleared for Takeoff!

Both my wife and and my sister are going to get on me for making so many posts (and none of these are among all of the drafts that I told them I have stacked up and waiting to go or develop) but, I better get them out while I have time and I’m thinking about them. I’ll try not to make it too long so that they don’t get bogged down. But if you want to keep track of the blogs you’ve read BlogBridge is an excellent program. Try it out sometime.

Let me first say that they just brought my new computer back! Praise the Lord! 2 hours instead of 2 days! Thats record time for my company! Now to explain my “catchy” post title. I went to heat up my lunch today and the programmed the microwave for 2 minutes (I make my food extra hot b/c I work and eat and it’ll get cold fast if I don’t.) When I hit the start button you would have thought the Concord was in the kitchen, on the runway, in the process of taking off! So…my thought was the microwave is dying. Well at least I’ll get my food heated up before that happens. WRONG! After 2 minutes and the proverbial BEEP BEEP, I took my food out and it was just as cold and it was when I first put it in! Well its a good thing we have three microwaves on each floor and six downstairs in the “common” area! I had to get a little exercise to get my food hot today, but I finally did to eat hot food.

While I was working, a co-worker, Megan, came by and told me the microwave had breathed its last breath.She was heating her food and could smell plastic burning. She shut it down and put it out of its misery. I guess BNAW (thats our maintenance division) will be carting that one away. The sooner they do, the less I’ll have to walk! 😉

Sufferring from Withdrawal

I test computer software for a living. My whole job has to do with breaking things and doing it fast! Its fun! Well in the course of doing my job I run two computers at the same time with as many as 4 different operating systems (3 different versions of windows and Linux) running at one time! At home I pretty much the same way when I’m working but I usually have three to four computers running (all the same version of Windows) and one running one of 5 differrent flavors of Linux. Today I am suffering withdrawal. I found out two weeks ago that one of my computers was too old to be on the network any longer and is not supported by my company because it costs too much to maintain. So….they came and hauled it away today and will be bringing me another, more up to date model, but not brand new. When the technician came, he saw my other comptuer—we’ll call this one my main computer—and he said…”Oh, that needs to go too!” So they will be taking that at some point and replacing it with a brand spanking new top of the line PC when it comes in.

But I said all of that to say this! I found out just how much I rely on having the different machines and just how efficient it is because it seems to be taking me forever to get things done with just one computer. I don’t know how people do it! 😆 I’m sitting here trying to figure out if I can actually get any work done with just one computer…..like what most of the other people in the company. Those poor folks must be so ineffeicient. 🙂 I was just assgined a new task and the deadline was—you got it—yesterday. I was really cruising with my two computers humming along. Well, now I am relegated to getting the same task done with just this one little old machine. I think I’m about to have an anxiety attack! Oh, wait, no, thats just the extra spice I put in my Pad Thai. Whew!

I realize that for most of the world this is not really an issue. I know my wife may read this and (sarcastically) think: “poor baby!” And whats worse….when they do bring my computer back I will only have enough time get it set up to the point that I need it just so that I can finish this task I’m on. All of the customization (special utility programs, special configurations, special rules, personalized and special applications….and worst of all…my snoopy desktop) will all have to wait! Oh, the thought of it all could make a grown man cry!

Who’s on First?

This is hilarious. I found this while I was out looking at Abbott and Costello stuff one day, but its not what you would typically expect. Its much shorter, but it doesn’t have to be long to make the point.

I thought you might want to see the original, so here it is!

Oh, and just for my kids, Costello is not the skinny one.