Quality Assurance is so much fun!

I test computer software for a living.  I think it’s a lot of fun because I actually go to work for the sole purpose of breaking something!  What a way to get your frustrations out, huh?  Well no, not really.  In fact, sometimes it can make you that much more frustrated.  But then there are days like today.   Here I am, Mr. QA, trying to test the search functionality of my product.  I type in a search (not realizing that I had a typo in my search).  The search had to pull up all documents that contained each of these words:  health education AND welfare.  Well, I was typing so fast that I did not realize that I had a typo.  I left the “L” out of the word “health.”  So my search had to find documents that had the words heath education and welfare.  Well, the funny part of all of this is that I got 5 hits!!!!  Amongt the hundreds of thousands of documents that were searched, there were actually 5 documents that had education and welfare spelled correctly; AND the health spelled incorrectly as heath!  Here I was having a slow morning and not finding any errors and the Lord directed my fingers and showed me five at one time to make up for the day! 😆

Paper Tray Empty

This happens to me so often that I just had to put a blog entry in about it.  God has arranged with my company that my cubicle is the one that is just outside of the copier/work room.  Pretty covenient, huh?  Well yeah, when I want to grab something off of the copier or when I need office supplies from the work room.  So, wherein lies the problem?  Herein lies the problem…… everybody thinks that I am the  copier administrator.   Is there such a thing?  Yes, where does he sit?  On the OTHER SIDE OF THE FLOOR.  Ridiculous, right?  Well not exactly, there is a carbon copy of the copier/workroom on his side of the floor too, but he is responsible for both.

So, anytime anyone has any problem with the copier machine, guess who they ask.  And, of course, I have nothing else to do except to work on my latest multi-million dollar project (shame I don’t get commission—I’d even take 1%!).  So I get up and leave all of my files open and unsecured while I go and help them solve the latest problem.  Who do I wind up helping the most?  People who get paid 2 – 3 times more than I do.  You got it– the managers.  Yep, the folks who run the company can’t run the copier.

Today’s incident is one that really blew me away.  I went back and forth in the copy room to get my output for my project.  I can do this because we have two copiers in each room:  The Big fancy, shmancy, do-everything-that-I-need-to-my-copies-and-do-it-quickly machine, and then the older, a little smaller, not much slower, but not as fancy machine.  Only 7 people on my floor use this copier–I know because I get to setup the users since nobody else can figure out how–No not even the copier administrator!.

When I hear people having problems with the big fancy copier, I direct my output to the other one.  It’s a bit fun watching folks turn their heads as I go and get my out put and leave.  Most are too proud to ask for help, so I eventually offer it—eventually! 🙂  Today I enjoyed hearing them discussing the message on the mahine that said “Paper Tray Empty–Load Paper.”  It blows my mind how many people don’t read the whole message or how many people just don’t use logic.  Today they were saying:  “Paper Tray empty?  The paper tray is full.”  If one is full, wouldn’t it stand to reason that there is an empty one somewhere if that is what the copier is indicating?  Well, I let this go  on for about 10 minutes before I offered the bailout (No nothing like the 700 Billion dollar gov’t bailout for the financial industry—that might be another post if I can get over the nausea and write it).

I went into the copier room…

ME:  “You know, if you get enough people in on of these rooms you can solve just about anything.  I’ve heard people work through Einstein’s theory of relativity in here!  So what’s the problem?” (as if I didn’t know).

Lady #1: “it says (notice the copier being personified) paper tray empty.  The paper tray is not empty.  We (I’m sure it took them both) just put 1,500 sheets of paper in it!”

ME:  So, I replied….”Hmmmm, you know the problem with these things is that copiers these days are made with no less than a gazillion paper trays.  Which one does it says is empty?”

Lady #2: “Which one?”

ME:  “Let me have a look….Oh OK, the message reads:  Refill paper tray 1.”

Lady #1:  “How am I supposed to know which one is paper tray 1”

ME:  “Don’t take  it from me, but I think it has something to do with these numbers that are on the paper trays.  Looks like you put 1,500 sheets in paper tray 4.”

I opened paper tray one and, sure enough, it was empty!  Imagine that!  So we (thats the collective we now–more like ME) put paper in paper tray one and the copier thanked everybody  and went about its business of doing what it was told to do—–now that the stupid humans did what they were requested to do.  So, the next time you walk into a copier room and you see a bunch of people stading around the copier dumbfounded….just go ahead and ask….. “Paper tray empty?” 😀 But be careful, you might become the copier administrator!

We now return our regularly scheduled multi-million dollar project.